ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide S3E66: Captain’s Holiday

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

66. Captain’s Holiday. I don’t want to talk about it. My therapy sessions are continuing nicely: I am allowed two thirty-minute walks a day and one hot bath a week, and, although I still have to use plastic utensils when I eat, the doctor says I’m doing much better. (Arrrrggggh; fifty of television’s most traumatic minutes. Haggard Jennifer Hetrick creates a clone of Captain Picard who then swanks about Risa in the most amazing swimtrunks in American history while things happen. Meanwhile, the unfilmed truth is that the real Jean-Luc keeps his real holiday aboard the Enterprise reading the Peter Pauper edition of Marcus Aurelius. Hey, Jennifer turned up about 1998 in an Oil of Old Age commercial playing the MOTHER! Hahahaha! Sunbeam is avenged!) (You can see an unbelievable picture of Jean-Luc’s swimtrunks on page 43 of the December 1999 issue of “Star Trek: The Extremely Expensive Magazine”; that’s the ish with Odo on the cover. You will go *thud* when you see this photo. “Star Trek: The Extremely Expensive Magazine” knows its audience. In the December 2000 ish – Sulu’s on the cover – there’s a fascinating article on “Jim Kirk: A Man and His Ripped Shirt!” They even include a pie chart in page 18 showing Jim Kirk: 15 percent eps bare chested, 7.5 percent eps ripped shirt, and 77.5 percent eps fully clothed. You can see Kirk’s chest in 22.5 per cent of eps! Not bad odds. Could be better. But not bad.)

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville Or just come on by every Sunday! We’ll love to see y’all!

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide S3E65: Alligance

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

65. Allegiance. Only the anti-Christ doesn’t love evil-twin stories! Here we double our pleasure and double our fun with Jean-Luc’s alien-synthesized evil twin. This is the only ep of TNG Mr. Sunbeam ever saw, so he thinks ALL episodes of TNG are like this, i.e. that TNG is a musical variety show hosted by Jean-Luc in Ten Forward. “Tonight, the Next Generation Boys and I want to sing *Minnie the Moocher* for all our friends at home!” All that aside, JLP has never looked foxier. And when the synthetic twin puts his limited moves on Bev, I stopped breathing. Oh, yeah, Deanna’s alleged “powers” are useless in this episode too.

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville Or just come on by every Sunday! We’ll love to see y’all!

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide S3E64: Sins of the Father

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

64. Sins of the Father. Once in a while, I get a spell of KRF – Klingon-Related Fatigue. And this is one of those times. Still, I rather like B’Etor and Lursa. (If only for their hot names.) Besides, I must say if I were a young, ambitious, attractive actress and offered my choice of roles: Deanna, Vash, or a Duras Sister, I’d pick Klingon in a second. That whole Deanna/Vash thing is somebody else’s strange fantasy, not mine, but Klingons are winners and that’s IT for the Klings. (See, just when you think you’re through with the Klingons, they give you a big open-mouthed kiss and everything starts all over again.)

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville Or just come on by every Sunday! We’ll love to see y’all!

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide S3E63: The Offspring

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

63. The Offspring. Trying to slash this episode is hard because it’s DATA’S DAUGHTER! She is so cool! She looks like Snow White! (The casting is perfect: Hallie Todd plays Lal and is totally brilliant: did you all know in RL Hallie Todd is the daughter of the actress who played Millie on “The Dick Van Dyke”? She comes by her cunningness naturally.) Meanwhile, she’s a misfit! She works in Ten Forward! She kisses Riker! (Rather nicely done scene.) She dies! Or blows a fuse! Or whatever! This is one of those great eps like “Yesterday’s Enterprise” where so many emotions are present that one is left rather happily drained. But no real sex.

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville Or just come on by every Sunday! We’ll love to see y’all!