You Know You Should be a Better Person (But You’re Not) 1/3
By Karmen Ghia
With apologies to Jay McInerney (or maybe he should thank me).
You know you’re unlucky when you and Thad G get to the post office after it’s closed. You knock politely on the glass door and are ignored. Thad G slams your body against the glass door until a postal employee threatens to call the police. You know it could be worse, but you’re not sure how.
“I swear, Thad, the money is there,” you whine like the sniveling little creep you are. “They open at 8:30 tomorrow, I’ll meet you–”
“I’m not meeting you anywhere,” Thad says in a way that makes your flesh crawl, as you marvel yet again that he can drag you down the street twisting your arm, while lighting a cigarette and talk at the same time. You hope he isn’t going to kill you now, but it’s hard to know what Thad G might do depending on his mood. He has a reputation for being a very moody guy.
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